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Alma Gill

Stories by Alma

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Apart While Being Together

Dear Alma, My husband and I have been married for over 25 years. We’re both in our late 50s. On the outside looking in, we’re a church going happy couple, but the reality is, we’re not.

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Little brother working my last nerve

Dear Alma, My little brother is getting on my last nerve. He is 32 and can’t seem to get it together. He is always calling me telling me how his water is about to be cut off or his car broke down and he doesn’t know how he’s gonna get to work.

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Making a Difference Between the Grandkids

Dear Alma, My husband and I are educated and very successful in our careers. We have been married for 10 years. I had a daughter when I was young, before I got married. She’s 15 now.

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Affair with a coworker

Dear Alma, I had an affair with a coworker that led to the demise of my marriage. Biggest mistake of my life. I feel as though I am getting the short end of the stick because her husband has no idea of the affair. Part of me says it’s something he should know.

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My husband embarrassed me

Dear Alma, We were recently at a cookout at my cousin’s house and I went over to sit on my husband’s lap. The next thing I knew, he pulled my dress up all the way over my head. I was soooooo embarrassed. My niece came over to help me get my dress down.

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Alcoholic parents

Dear Alma, My Dad and my Stepmom have been together for over 20 years. They both have and always did drink way too much. I’d even say both are alcoholics.

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Teen wants to chill with ‘boyfriend’

Dear Alma, My 17-year old-daughter claims she has a boyfriend. I said no u don’t your too young. Now she says she wants to chill at his house for a little while; she says his mother said it’s ok & will be there & it’s ok with his mother.

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Anxiety about Step-son’s Wedding

Dear Alma, My stepson, who I adore and have known most of his life, is getting married next summer. I love him and love the girl he is getting married to. Here is my problem.

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Our Girlfriend Doesn’t Get It

Dear Alma, Within my group of friends, I have a female friend who likes a male friend who is also within the group. The female recently joined the group, but the male has been around some time. The female has tried her best game and, to much dismay, has not won over the male friend.

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Reverend needs heavenly advice

Dear Alma, My brother in-law is a minister, but he’s also an oblivious, self-centered fool. At Christmas, he irritates people by doing things like sitting in my 94-year-old mother’s favorite chair and acts hurt when we tell him to get up.

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Loved Like a Son

Dear Alma, I am 35 and my sweet lady is 57. I love her and she loves me. Although we don’t go out much, we show our affection to each other in many ways. She and I both are homebodies. We live in different states, so our time together is special.

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An Expensive Invitation

Dear Alma, Three years after my divorce I met a really nice man. I am 34 years old, financially secure with no children. So far we make each other happy and get along really well. We both pay for things when we go out. I own my stuff, condo and car, and so does he. When we go out, never dutch, one or the other picks up the tab and it’s never been a problem.

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Fit or Unfit Mother?

Dear Alma, I’m a divorced mom with an 8-year-old son. I lost 60 lbs, and my confidence is better than ever. I recently started online dating, and I’m having a great time. I didn’t have a sitter, so I took my son with me on a date. My ex-husband is furious and said I’m an unfit mother. I think he’s jealous of how I look. I don’t think I was wrong. What do you think?

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To Tell or Not to Tell

The mom of one of my 10-year-old daughter’s friends confided in me that her husband had been physically and verbally abusive to her several times. (Unfortunately, as many people do in this situation, she did not press charges because she didn’t want her kids to have to deal with the fallout.)

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High School Flame

Dear Alma, What do you do in a situation where you never got closure from a high school relationship and then that person finds you on Facebook 35 years later and wants to just talk about what went wrong to cause the separation?

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Intimidated by Girlfriend

Dear Alma, My girlfriend is absolutely beautiful, gentle and kind, loving and respectful. Ninety-five percent of the time everything is perfect. But every now and again she goes off. She curses, screams, and throws things and just follows me around arguing.

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A Family Divided

Dear Alma, I need advice about a terrible family situation that involves me and all of my siblings, and it’s breaking us apart. I am one of nine children. We were all born and raised in the South. My parents farmed their land and taught us how to do it, too. We never liked it and couldn’t wait to leave, go up North and go to college.

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Mother-in-Law is not Mom

Dear Alma, When I married my husband a few years ago, my mother in-law invited me to start calling her “Mom” as opposed to her given name. I was uncomfortable with the suggestion for a couple reasons – and without giving you a full-blown explanation, I just plain don’t want to. My MIL has never been ok with this and often politely corrects me in front of family members.

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Keep my Nephew Away from my House

I know this may sound mean, but I can’t stand my sister’s son. He’s three years old and he talks back and never listens to what I tell him to do. He comes to my house and breaks up my stuff, and she just sits there like nothing is happening.

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My Mother-in-Law Shows Favoritism

I have a problem with my mother-in-law. She does not treat my husband and his brother the same. My husband and I have two grown children – a son and a daughter. Both are living on their own; neither is married; and my son lives in another state. My husband has one brother. He’s gay and doesn’t have any children.

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Should I or Shouldn’t I?

Dear Alma, I love my husband and he loves me. We have a very, very happy marriage. We have been married 15 years, and we don’t have kids by choice. He and I work out and we’re in great shape. We work hard at being physically attractive for each other.

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My Parents Didn’t Tell Me I was Adopted

Dear Alma, I’m 48 and single. I’ve had a great life with good friends and loving parents who are both now deceased. I travel for work, which is why I haven’t settled down, married and had children. Last year, I was home for a family funeral and my cousin asked if we could spend more time together.

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I Snapped at my Mother-in-Law

Dear Alma, We were at my niece’s 5th birthday party. I’m pregnant, and it has not been easy. My MIL [mother-in-law] arrived and started greeting everybody. Then she asks how “baby Orlando” is doing. I didn’t answer her because we have not picked out a name for our baby.

I want to put my ex-husband’s wife into time out

Dear Alma, My ex-husband remarried last year. His new wife wants to be involved in our conversations about our kids. I like her, respect that she takes care of my kids when they are at their house, but does every sentence about our kids have to be a group meeting?

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From the wrong side of the tracks

I am 28, female and I live with my 33-year-old boyfriend. I love him tremendously, and in many ways we are very compatible. He is affectionate, has always been faithful to me and has never put me down in any way.

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Not Enough Home Cooking

Dear Alma: Over my long Thanksgiving weekend, everywhere I went I encountered my married brothas complaining about the same thing – wives not wanting or initiating sex.

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Ask Alma

Our sister didn’t tell us our father had died

Dear Alma, I have a terrible problem concerning my dad. My mother and father were married for more than 50 years and had four children – three girls and a son – all now grown. We all work full-time jobs and live in different states. Only one – a sister – lives near my parents. She is not married and has no children. I recently called to wish my father a happy birthday, and my sister informed me that he was dead.

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Reconnecting with an Old Flame

I’m a 60-year-old man, married to the same woman for 33 years. I recently reconnected with my high school girlfriend on Facebook.

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He won’t Let me Visit his House

I have been dating “David” for over eight months, but I have never been to his house. Every time I bring it up, he changes the subject or comes up with a lame excuse.

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Ask Alma

Dear Alma, I am a 25-year-old man. I consider myself very nice and caring. I live with a woman I met in February of this year. Things do not seem to be working out. I feel that I have been giving all that I can give.

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Can I Fall in Love with my Cousin?

I was married for 20 years and have two grown children. I met my husband when he was best friends with a male cousin of mine. After we graduated high school, my cousin left to join the Army. We called and stayed in touch at first, but later the calls were fewer and fewer.

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Ask Alma

Should I Get Involved or Mind my Business?

A male friend of mine moved to my city for a 6-month work assignment. To welcome him to the area, I took him to dinner and introduced him to my local friends. Well, I just learned that he has been having a sexual relationship with a sorority sister, who’s also my best friend.

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